Finance, Forex and Investments

how does my movie story sound?

The basic concept is pretty simple the hero falls in love with a girl however his parents are divorced and the heroine's father tells the hero that he will only allow his daughter to marry the hero if he re-unites the family. Here is a brief scene order and description please tell me if it is good. 1. The brief childhood memories of the family bonding between the heroine, Tamannah is shown followed by the divorce of the hero's(siddu) family and his morbid childhood. 2. The hero grows up with his mother and their bond is depicted followed by his pain in trying to maintain relationship with his dad while giving attention to his mom. His friends and his interests are introduced yet his pain of wanting a family is depicted throughout. 3. The heroine enters the hero's college as a foreign exchange student as she is born in India and the hero is more of an indian living in USA. The hero falls in love with the heroine yet the heroine feels unable to adjust to the new culture arising in the US. He finds solace in her just as she finds some love in him. 4. They both become more and more attached to them and the hero's becomes more open and sees the true value of life. The heroine meanwhile becomes more open in the university setting. 5. The heroine takes the hero all the way back to India and there the heroine's father tells the hero that he will only allow him to marry his daughter if he re-unites his family. 6. The hero remembers the time in which his father marries his mother yet due to the economic conditions his dad gets fired at work. With no money, the family gets in major financial problems and even more, his dad wasn't able to get work anywhere and prevents the hero's mother from working cause he doesn't want society to look down upon him. 7. The hero's mother gets fired from college due to a complaint filed by a former student who got attacked by the hero's mother. In reality, all the hero's mother did was scold at the child and lightly hit her due to the stress she is going through. 8. The hero moves to the Vizag area where he borrows a flat from his friend and he stays there with his mom. The hero then lies to his mom about working at a restaurant and instead goes to his dad's house to supply his mom money. However one day she finds out the truth and she suddenly freaks out. 9. The hero then states how his mother's rejection of his father's money was similar to his father's rejection of his mother's desire to work and how these things must be adjusted through relationships. 10. The next day the hero's mother leaves and the hero tries looking for his mother. In the end, he gets a call from the heroine and he finds out how his mother is in their house and how the heroine found her besides the road unconscious, 11. The hero also moves into the heroine's house and there the hero and her mother slowly blend into the life and more comedy and light-hearted moments prevail. 12. The hero's father wants to extend his business and wants to break down the shopping mall to extend a parking lot yet the heroine's father owns a store down there. The hero then tells his father how the girl he loves needs the shopping mall. The hero takes his father to the heroine's house and puts a veil over him so tat the problems between his mother and the father wouldn't be exposed to the heroine's family. 13. The hero's father eventually finds out about relationships similarly to the way the mother did. 14. The hero's mother and father re-unite followed by the hero and the heroine

Public Comments

1. It sounds good, now develop and write it
2. You points show now cause and effect. 1. Why does the girl's father want the boy to reunite families and when were they ever united, and what business is it of either or them, and why not have the father do it himself? 2 Vague but I see where you are going as far as his own family is concerned 3 Probably should be point one. It is out of timing 4 Probably should be point two. The proposal should be three even if this is an arranged marraige 5 This is step one so I am guessing one was a summary now 6 Not possible for him to remember his parents getting together. he was not born yet. 7 Contradicts point six. If she could not work when did that change. I can only guess you are saying the divorced be fore this but you did not state it. 8 Why would the father give him the money? Why would she take the money from her son if she is so into earning money? Why is the son meddling at this point? 9 States the obvious but inspires no reason to change. 10 Odd coincidence ending up at their house. Too convenient. 11 Why the change in mood? What changes anyone? 12 It is getting way to contrived here, too easy and too unbelievable. The father has no reason to change for his son when he would not change for his wife. 13 A little late on the lesson. 14 You are not doing enough work with the four supporting characters. They need more points. Stop relying so much on the main characters. If you want this to be a good story develop the other characters more and swap the focus of the story between characters . tell it third person, maybe even narative. On the plus side you have a beginning and end and a middle so you have a plot. All you need is some texture and some sub texture to make this a movie. Good Work So Far.